14 weeks

I’ve finally entered my second trimester of pregnancy and I got to tell ya, its pretty boring finding out you’re pregnant 14 DPO and then not seeking any prenatal care outside of myself. Hard to “feel” pregnant. Although the pangs of a growing fetus and the fact that I’ve felt the baby fluttering around in there since I was 10 weeks along helps.

I haven’t found the time or the energy to blog on further topics, although I have many ideas on what to write about, but there was an occurrence today that bothered me and I needed to rant about it.

I attended a wedding today of a former nursing school classmate friend of mine. There were 2 other former friends from nursing school that attended as well. We were at the table with 2 of them, one is pregnant and several weeks ahead of me and has never gotten a nursing job after school, and the other is working as a nurse in a plastic surgery clinic. My boyfriend, Joshua, was making conversation and proudly boasted how we were doing a home birth.

The plastic surgery nurse was obviously shocked and just said, “Wow, you’re very brave.”

And made some comments about not being able to birth without the medications. I just replied that I’m not brave, I’m just educated and spoke of how wonderful birth feels unmedicated and how horrible my hospital experiences were.

When the pregnant nurse friend sat down, plastic surgery nurse says, “She’s having a home birth!”

Pregnant nurse says, “Yeah I know (bride nurse) told me.” In a disappointed tone of voice.

Then she proceeded to tell me how crazy I am and doesn’t get why I’d do a home birth. I just again said I’m educated I know what I am doing and tried to let the subject drop, as confrontations are not something I feel like dealing with as an emotionally unstable pregnant lady.

I realized it was time to leave to get back to my kids and as I leaned in to hug plastic surgery nurse she said, “Please go to a hospital.”

  I said, “I’m not going to a hospital, a home birth is much safer than a hospital.”

Pregnant nurse friend says, ” At least go see a nurse or something.” 

I said, ” I am a nurse.”

Pregnant nurse friend says, ” yeah but see a real one with a real nursing job.”

I just turned and walked out the door really pissed off and was about to cry because I’m pregnant and emotional. But I just could not believe the nerve of people who don’t even have the knowledge to speak on a subject and try and tell me what to do with myself and my unborn child and that my choices are wrong. I hope they would never speak to patients like that, but I bet I’m wrong. Where is this Patient’s Bill of Rights and the Right of Informed Consent we were taught? Knowledge and rights are based on what a nurse knows? Or what they don’t know? But I particularly find it insulting to make comments like this to me when I specifically work and am in school for the field of birth and breastfeeding. Ohh so that 1 class we all took together for OB in nursing school makes you so much more knowledgeable about my birth than all the education I’ve taken upon myself outside of school and also in a different institution with a curriculum based around birth and breastfeeding?

It doesn’t even matter that we all work in the medical profession, if a mother (or father) mentions they’re doing a home birth no one should give catty remarks based on a lack of knowledge. Its not common place to insult or be unsupportive with the scheduled csection mother yet for some reason its acceptable to ridicule the person who actually is making educated informed decisions.

If a person is making choices based on complete informed decision making, everyone should be supportive PERIOD.